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jayasama.livejournal.com is my new for the interested... the others... sadly... SCREW! :D
J-M and I are not in the most payful jobs at the moment... He wanted me to try as hard as possible to be a hairdresser with no success due to "grading up" issues... I would need more classes and specializasion for my bosses to let me do more work, and so more hours...
I was sticking to a 15 hours a week to survive my monthly payments and weekly grocery... I actually got fine due to the use of money I had stored to pay my braces, but using it means smaller pays when I get a better job.
Which is why I'm going back to the grocery store... At elast I'll have more than 25 hours/week there.
I also have to pay my school loan by the end of march :( I'm in debt of over 9K and was jobless for over a month practically...
For jm's part, there was an employee cut... He was taken off his job to another department in which he lost 5$/hour of salary... and now, by friday, he has 80% chances of loosing his job.
Like many others due to economic slack.
We're still working hard not to stress out too much :) we're trying to see the positive, but honnestly, it can be really hard by these days. it'll go better only if he can find a job when he gets cut.... otherwise I'll have to pay the internet on top of the grocery (s'not that bad) but it'S counting my loan and current debts that annoy me...
My old boss told me to get equipement, and now I'm stuckk with 600$ of debt for nothing since I couldn't use it... EVER. it's just a 600$ lying there for nothing.
We're also eager to get our tax refund... Which I'll be able to send the papers in once my god damn school sends me my supply reciep...GRRRR
*sigh*
I guess that's it... postpone wedding so far.
My brother also lost his job. Luckily his gf, Melissa, is at 100% salary even if she's got to stay home from blood pressure problems... it's her pregnancy causing it so she has to stay home to relax. Any efforts, including bathroom and shower is hard for her. She never felt this way before.
And she's a nurse... In one of the most overloaded hospital in the province. there are too many people there, hence too much stress and work to even try to work while having what she has.
not getting any money or almost nothing and living on braces fund advance, I needed to give back the money i used. again, I'm 2 weeks without a job but I'll make it through anyway. it's always scary though.
As another good news though, I learned on january 1st that i'd be an aunt :) my brother's girlfriend melissa is pregnant :D only one month so we don't know if it's a girl or a boy yet :)
I'm happy for them, even though my brother learned this morning that he lost his job because of lack of job :( you know, with the economy problem and all... :( but I'm sure he'll find something to live on for the moment.
I'll be looking for a second job in the future myself when I talk it out with my boss about my hours at the hair salon. pretty stressfull when you know she needs you on the three biggest days of the week. I'll have to find something to work in for the rest of the hours of the week without thirsday through saturday... hard!!!
anyway I'll find a way to make things work out as much as possible :)
that's all!
viva la economica!!
Had been working at the salon for a month, was highly unsatisfied... so I found a new one with more hours and a job AFTER internship :) a very nice place I might add! love it!
Also, J-M has decided it was time to act, and he decided to tell everyone we were getting married. this means, he's ready for it himself :0 I'm very happy about it.
So we'll be looking around soon enough to havea placeholder for the church and reception. We'll do it at my hometown, and the reception in his :)
Christmas ws tiring, but fun. J-M and I spent a night at W hotel (starwoods) in montreal and we loved the look of it! we spent the night out walking around to find a convenient store, which wasn't much of a success since the closest was closed, and the other was was 3 miles away or so... wierd, since we were close to a bridge AND in a big area to be in!
But we found a tim horton's a street higher corner of beaver hall and rené-levesque :)
We still hadn't cleaned from the dinner we held on dec 23 with our friends, so I need to finish all of this tonight. I'm working in the morning tomorrow and will be free in the evening!
I also became addicted to Soul Eater :)
On another news, I might be attending New York anime fest if I can get my passport. Luckily, i found two friends that told me they were going and I had already planned to find people to attend it! she came to me and told me she was planning to go :)
if I can get my passport, I'll go there instead of OTAKON... Baltimore is farther away and I'd prefer this year at NY anime fest because....
SUMIKIN, the awesome cosplayer, will be there! :D
I wish I went to Otakon with Dark Link (guy) and Roxas 9vince) like they're planning so I could meet pikminlink, but NY anime fest might be the only time FRIENDS I KNOW are going XD
Otherwise, I'm still planning to attend Toronto's Anime North and Montreal's Otakuthon...
crazy are those showing up at Ganime, anime north, otakuthon, fanexpo, dot-con, naru2-u in the same year... XD too much money and too much travel for me :)
one in toronto, one in Montreal and another in NY city... enough I believe of 7 drive for both locations other than MTL! XD
Other than that, I'll be preparing a list if invitations for the wedding next week. I'm inviting some people for dinner (closest) and others for the party like my dad suggested. Some people I know are close, but not enough to have them use the moeny WE'll be spending on the lunch. Might as well attend for the party and have fun :)
I wish I could tell Al about this, but even though I have him on facebook, I barely get to seee him active! I might send him a msg just in case... who knows maybe I just don't SEE him active and he is :P hehe
I guess that's it so far... I'm pretty comfy at the appratment... My place, my cat's feeling nice about it as well, my parents came to visit this weekend ^^ something I never thought would happen since I'm 40 minutes away from them!!!
I only need to find my brother some time so he can show up with Melissa :) he's the only who didn't come XD
I miss my family :3 and love them so much ^^
well, gotta go finish my cleaning now!
but I still have 6 boes or so lying around undone... T_T
I didn't have time to do anything.
Monday - school, mom's house to get more stuff, get home, shower, sleep.
tuesday - dentist, school, work, home, supper, look at things online 10 minutes, shower, sleep.
wednesday (today) - school, work, been witha friend for 2 hours to talk (he pops up randomly at work and we talk for a looong time), got home, not hungry, look through things, put clothes in the dryer, sleep.
tuesday (to come) - school, work, mom's to pik up some lsat bits of clothes and foods, place them in the fridge home and all, shower, sleep.
friday -0 DAY OFFFF!!!!!!! YAYAZ!!!!!!! boxes maybe? and work at the salon.
XD I have NOOOOO time to clean those boxes!!!!!!!!
computer's installed, clothes are set, bed is set, the rest... nothing done.
and I just called mom to know where she put my ipod and she said in a box, but only the case was there... she mentionned she remember putting it inside, the without the case, but it's nowhere to be found...
my precious ipod, i always wanted one and have so many things for it that I loooove using, it calms me, I bring it everywhere and now it's gone... T_________T
I voted for something I believed could help the country, but not my personnal preference.
I came out of the scrutin'S crying, ashamed of my choice, but glad I helped for the better of our country.
Politics is a childish game, where every deputees fight each other verbally and tries to get people on their side.
My part is not present in every province, only Qc and this is what I believe in, to stop the other parties from putting us, french canadians aside and force them to hear our rights just like the others. That's why it's called "the bloc"
I wanted conservatory minor and it's what I got. if it became major, Canada would've become another U.S.A and have a prie minister twin to Goerge W. Bush.
we're free of our choice, but would've become puppets and slaves to an english gouvernement that would've wanted to kill french language, put abortion illegal, kids who have commited crimes like murder, nuder the age of 15 would've been given life prison sentences, reduced the cultural budget to stop the movie creation, humorist, comedians and singers to perservere, and SO ON.
Believe me, it turned out the best way it could event hough it'S far from the gouvernement I want to have. (this is when you're supposed to understand I'm a proud fernch canadian, quebecker and "souvrainiste" that wants independant quebec OR respect >.>)
anyways, this is not the point, but mostly writing news and about my feelings.
Also, I'm moving out this weekend :) I'm making boxes and while I'm working tomorrow, my dad, and two unclse as well as my frind aleander and my boyfriend are goig to bring my stuff over there.
Some things will go to my parent's new home since they don't fit in the appartment.
We'll be comfortable ^^
I'm also bringing pikachu along with me next week. She can't stay at my aunt's so I'll keep her for the time being, and keep her forever :3 if she CAN'T get along with j-m, still after 5 years, we'll give her back to my parents :( when they get the house in mid november.
it'll be ahrd on her since when i'll work I wont be home before 9 o'clock and she wont have dinner until then!
cute cat ^^
anyways.... i's time to pack my computer!!!!!
so i'll leave this on that note:
take care for everyone who is having a hrd time :) I'll write again some time this week about a few things I did last week, and this week ^^
it's jsut y computer wont be plugged bfore tonight, late :3
What hurts most is my left jaw.... Somehow a braquet at the back is very close to it so very movement made with it irritates the skin or feels like when they poke that numbing needle in your cheek when fixing a cavity :) or if it's stuck somewhere.
I can tolerate it. I also use wax on some braquets since they're rashing all the time against the side of my lips, inside. Before I get ulcers, I used wax:)
I'm starting to get used to that junk!
Also, at school, my customer was in fact a craeted, fictionnal customer that a girl put for herself and never showed up! some guess what? my customer never showed up, AGAIN.
I'm never gonna have my portfolio ready if it keeps this up!m I need to give it back in 3 weeks!!
hell!
I'll have to work on it asap.
So, I'm working saturday, off sunday, off monday for star bedard convention, tuesday I'll be at jm's hosue and go work in the evening. then I'll go back to school :)
I was tierd, my jaw was hurting from all the stretching and pushing on my teeth. I woke up at night, took advils to ease the pain that was keeping me awake, and this morning was aweful as well. I can't touch at all my teeth... together or not. sometimes, pain strokes come that can be hard to bear.
overall, my nerves are very sensitive.
I skipped school, but I'll take a shower, ehad for the job agency and go to school for the end of day, then go work. I'll find my 70 advils bottle, since all the others in the hosue are EMPTY. good timing, huh?
so far I guess I can say it hurts a bitch.
I'm in pain... and eat soft food. I can't evenclanch my teeth together so much they hurt.
I have a very small mouth and my lips are a bit cracked from yesterday's dryness an pulling.
I hope I'll feel better for my exam tomorow T_T
for now, I'll go but wil try not to speak for nothing. my jaw really hurts from yesterday.
I have to go back on october 7 and november 4. why? no idea, they were in a rush since they took a bit more time than the 2 hours they expected. The way it's done, the braces work FASTER and it takes half the time to put in.
but the ortho pushed on my teeth I thought he would crush them.
*sigh*
There are two brackets they didn'T put, they have to wait for the few that are taking too much plcae to give more accessibility. to therE's the wire that's bothering that goes OVER those two teeth. ARGH the pain of teeth touching each other. unbearable. and the pain stays when it happens... it gets better after a minute or two, but whent eh strokes get on, I can feel my heart pouding in my teeth T_T
there's one thing that I'm sure of....
it'll be worth it in the end.
We went to Quebec city on tuesday to wednesday. We got there at 4:30 because of all the usual traffic downtown Montreal. It's full of traffic to go to the north shore. I'm no thesouth to give you the image XD
We visited half of the orleand island where my family comes from about 300 years ago. It was nice!
pretty and full of friendly people! We stayed at a campnig (5 star one) for the night and left the next morning, early to visit the blacksmith on the island. The last one in the province. His work is incredible! Artistic and well worked! J-M was in heaven!
We didn'T go through the last part of the island but we went to the aquarium afterwards! I took quite a few pics! then, the civilisation museum. It was "the golds of america! VERY nice seeing this 10 million dollars and moer worth exposition. to see the world's biggest piece of money made of 99,999% gold. This is the biggest of the world, Canada's 1 million dollar piece. And other golds of canada :)
There were also things on the world in 30 years because of all the polution and environment. And about quebc's hisory. it was very interesting!
no the weekend befoer, we visited Fort Lennox. This is where british attacken the french long ago through the richelieu river after cmoing frmo Lake Champlain to conquest the french. Quite a good history lesson this summer :)
Oh, this year was quebec city's 400th. this means, quebec was foundd 400 years ago. One of the first cities in america.
Well, we came back home wednesday night and left thursday afternoon for laurentiens, a town called ste-agathe-des-monts. That's in the mountains. We took the night off, the next day we did some bike on the little north train, an old railroad, and the next day we came back home.
we had a great time :) so I came back saturday, saw Alex and his gf, sunday I worked from 8 to 5, today from 1:30 to 5:30, cleaned ni the morning for a house visit (who didn't come because they found a palce for the same price with a garage instead of a pool). I ate after work, got a call from Draven asking to go over for a photoshoot!
it was AWESOME I have numerous awesome photos to show! only my camera died and Icouldn'T transfer them to my computer. it'll have to recharge overnight.
school tomorrow morning, then I need to go to roger's wireless to get my phone sent for fixing and then go around towns nearby to find a new job.
this summerizes my life right now XD
I'm done expending and I've been pretty much slacking on it, yet it's all perfect.
Though today's appointment was to take prints of my whole dentition the way it is right now to send them to a laboratory in the United States to get a virtual treatment done in 3D. That way they can create the braces perfectly each and everyone of them for my teeth. So each tooth has its own braquet made FOR it.
Only it takes some weeks to get done.
But to get this done, they had to take out both of my expanders...
This is the msot painful thing I've ever felt at the dentist. WORST then getting my wisdom teeth removed. Here how it went:
- They forced the expanders braquets to unglue themselves put pulling on them bit by bit. Only this feels like your tooth is sensitive from a cavity and then they try to pull it out. It feels horrible... I was shaking after he tried taking ungluing the first ones on the left.
Shaking of pain and discomfort. I've never felt that bad. Though once they were ALL done and the expanders were out it didn't hurt since the pain was sudden and constant with force.
- My mouth felt wonderful being fere and HUGE. I felt fere and fine... the feeling was wierd at first for getting used to 9 months expanders, but it was PLEASANT! I could pronounce the word "CHIEN" SOOO WELL! (Chien is Dog in french)
- After that they took prnits with strange mint hardening thing. The top shape didn'T fit right and they kept pushing on it but iot HURTS! Then they asked where it did, and it was my jaw bone. My back molary it so close to my jaw bone at the back that there was NO space to make the plastic thing rest. it's 4 minutes 30 seconds waiting for the top, same at the bottom.
- They did the same thing putting that junk, but orange, on my bottom teeth and asked me to bite on it for 6 seconds.
- they then checked and put back my expanders. Biting on the thing to get it in HURTS LIKE A BITCH TOO.
But if I take my out my expanders, it'll be the final last time because it hurts like a bitch and it's something I wish I didn't have to do. But since the teratement will be faster doing the indirect braces, It don't mind... it's just REALLY painful and twice at 8 places is something I NEVEr want to feel after next month. If an adult shaked and almost cried, imagine a CHILD. And I'm pertty resistant to pain T_T they fixed a cavity while I was half numb only. HURTS let me tell you.
My right bottom tooth is sensitive and makes me want to sleep. I can only eat with my front teeth.
Right now, I can close only ONE tooth with the other on the left. The others DO NOT touch themselves at all it's hard to eat, seriously. When teeth don't get together and only one does. When I smile with my teeth, only one is touching the one at the bottom.
-sigh- onces I get these braces worst will be done...
I seriously never thought expanders removal was that painful... T_____T
it took 1 hour and 45 minutes to do everything.
I told him, since he was alone creating this huge event that we might call an Anime christmas convention, I proposed my help :P
he deleted the event, recreated it, and I mentionned I was attending (even thuogh it's this summer).
I JUT noticed today, after someone left a message on the event wall, that I was an admin :P this means benjamin and I are creating the event... that and along with gai, who I'll mostly call Aizen :P He was the perfect aizen cosplayer and I must say sexiest too. We're all there giong to organize it :)
ben is supposed to look for the palais des congres, or two rooms from it for the small gtg. A room for photoshoots and another for people to gather.
I really hope it all works out. I think I had to call him but didn't have time...
he's the one who suggeste hanging out with him at the last con, and he left me hang out with them all bleach crew. (he was ichigo) we hadn't seen each other since a friend's birthday party, and before that little time in may, our last meeting was in highschool where he was annoying as hell!
he totally changed and seems to be sharing a similar interest... gives me one friend to go to conventions with :P
after all, I got none besides this lucky meeting I had at otakuthon... I was about to take my leave when I decided to go ask him for some news.
he studied in the same school and class in college as David and Madgin (two of my closest friends as well as jm's friends).
you nkow, I thought i'd be doomed to attend conventions no my own forever!!! T_T and here I am organizing a small convention gtg for cosplayers for christmas... pretty neat.
Oh, I looked through my facebook today and found it wierd how some stupid girl I know (I accepted for no reason...) and as wanting to make people jealous while there is nothing to envy her for... she took off the married status to engaged, from engaged to in a relationship in 3 days... today she mentionned she was engaged :P no she was never married and pour guy who would...
but she wanted people to see it...
she also accused her sister-in-law (not married though, heeee) that she was pergnant because she wanted to do like her.... but the other girl was pregnant without a father for the boy, but accepted to keep him so a child wouldn't be the result of her own misacts.
while the other admitted to everyone a week ago that she was pregnant simlpy to get a bigger paychek from the gouvernement... she lives on social aid, which is OUR money because she hates working and thinks its useless if you can be GIVEN money by people...
see the type and why I hate her?
jm today also told me about someone who wanted to add him on facebook.... :P believe it or not, withuot having ANY link to his profile ANYWHERE since he's new to facebook and the bitch has nO ONE from HIS friends in HERS... mynouchka bitch asked for a friend request :P
I'm pretty suer she's never been over him... she always wanted to steal him from me until the day I knew about it (4 years ago) and I'm pertty sure she would've wanted to retry not knowing if we were still together!
funny thing is, he blocked her :P a good decision... somehow, we ALL realized (even friends) that she was simply acting to fit everyone's personnality to steal peopl and know as many as possible...
but to end up friend requesting him, she HAS to type his name in the searh option :P he's impossible to find since he has less than 20 friends there, and most are family! :P
silly bitch... thinking she can come back here and steal everything from me again, I found it so funny I wrote my faceboko status about her "HAHA thinking that bitch can come abck and steal aain? she has to dream of candy pink lamas!"
something along those linse... though the lama thing is exactly what I wrote XD
-sigh- I can'T believe she's still alive... I thought someone would've killed her by now...
I wuold, I'd be ready to go in jail forever just to know she can't enjoy life after all she did to everyone and myself (mostly myself) for abusing trust and kidness of others...
good thing she lives farther now :P
anyways...I'm still working worknig and working... trying to get some cards dnoe for ronincards, or rather trying to figure out how works the uploading thing...
and just a few mintues ago I was browsing through one of my friend's photos on facebook. Her name is Sonia.
I click for next phoots, and end up on a pic saying "new couple!" with my brother's ex, Erika, and her new boyfriend... they say she vents to everyone SHE dumped him and that she's been with that enw guy for a while.
funny thing is, my brother told her to get the hell out and dumped her hard that night, not the other way around :P
we all think "if he survives... good for him!"
But I think Melissa is a girl my brother will be with her for a while. after all, she's erika's opposite, and erika was Alex's opposite too :P
funny huh?
but the more we talk, the more I think, the more I WILL move there... right?
He made me notice that what I was amd about the other day, was similar to waht made hmi decide it was time to move out of the family nest.
I was mad because everytime I leave later than 10 pm, my parents yell and scream they don't like it in case I get ni an accident... I've been driving for almost 4 years now, on my own. i've gained more experience on high density roads as well as highways than them. They never go as far as I do.
That, and the fact that they barely listen to me... mom tries her best, but dad seems to be asking questions just because he has to. Asking me things, and 5 minutes later, ask the same question AGAIN... mom, a morning asked me 4 tmies in 5 minutes at what time I was working... the last time I told her, calm, "mom, I repeat it for the 4th time... 11:30"
Mom: we tried to call you all evening! where were you???? we were worreid sick!
me: mom... I told dad this morning I was working from 4:30 to 9...
dad: oops.... I just remembered... I THINK she told me, yeah.
give me a brek, it's like that everyday.
Whenever I put my room clean, some things taht are not mine end up in my room, thrown either on my bed or bedside table... not that I don't keep it clean, they jsut come back everyday to throw carelessly anything they THINK is mine, because my room is closest to the main rooms.
aka stargate series lying around in my room for he past 6 months.... HELL THEY KNOW I DISLIKE STARGATE!!!
so overall, jm says he was reacting the same about his parents.
I know I'm young, 20 years old is not a lot, but I'm not 17 witha fresh licence and fresh wanna drink and get drunk than drive attitude... I dont even go in clubs or the likes. I simply go to another town, 30 minutes away to see my boyfriend between 11 pm and 12 am.
I have a cellphone, if anything happens it happens... there are less cars in the area at night, might as well take that advantage to avoid others to bump into me or something. it's always the other's fauilt here.
the more I think about it, the more I'll be getting ready to move out.
finding a job as a hairdersser assistant in august, leave the grocery store once and for all and settle down while going to school and paying my debts asap. while helping jm a bit every week since he's letting me stay for free.
:) I'm lucky. hopefully things work out that well once school starts again for a last semester
I'm a person that likes to eat and has a bad habbit of eater in some bad times
aka
- watching tv, which happens once every couple of dys before going to bed = ++++++ bad idea
- eating sugar things after exercise
- eating junk food and chocolate at work from all the "I fucking don't know what to eat at work, so let's go for the easy stuff by the cash...
I really want to control this and be a better me.
I want to be able to shop and FIND something...
I was shopping sunday and the girls and guys NOTICED how HELLA HARD it is for me to shop... because there are 3 different problems...
1. I'm at the limit size in regular clothes stores and they don't hold many of my size...
2. I'm too small for + sizes...
3. My breasts don't fit in regular clothes. They fit in +, but I'm not "fat" enough to fit in the rest, thus making me tlook 40 pounds bigger.
I believe this to be a CHUBBY BUSTY girl's biggest problem...
I found 2 pieces of clothes... one I haveto wear a tube top under it so it wont show my whole "crack" and breasts (think makoto in bleach)
and a dress (I DId wanted a summer dress) and it has to be plain and look like a night dress (affing a few ribbons on it makes it look like a real dress so it all ends up I found 2 pieces instead of 6 like I expected... and I have skirts, but no shorts)
I told them... I'm not difficult, I don't fit!
I'm between everything x_x I'm between marie-claire, and marie-france stores god damnit!
and one dress I thought would fit, didn'T have my size... they sold the last one a few minutes ahead T_T
I really need to at least lose 2 sizes... if I do, it'll be easier for me to shop and look good... or not like an old mom.
not that I'm that big... my friend is bigger than me, yet she finds nice clothes because her breasts are TINY.... I'm smaller, but have waaaaay bigger breasts so nothign fit...
if my bust fits somewhere, it makes me look fatter... if it fits perfect over the belly, it'll explode over the breasts... what's a shirt? I don't know what a shirt is anymore!!!
hella.. I also need to feel in shape again and feel nice about myself.
end.
but Neondrane chose me for his character's voice! (don't know all the details yet but I'm pretty sure it'll be cool)
some female ninja thing! :3 I'm SO ubber happy ^^ he's giving me a huge opportunity here, especially fora french speaker who will voice act english XD (I'm pretty sure it'll be some flash thing :3)
anyways XD I had a feww iches while recording, sometimes because of my expanders XD but it overall came out awesome!
http://media.putfile.com/Neon-Drane-Cha
http://media.putfile.com/Audition-sampl
anyways... I'm pretty sure it'll be really fun to do :) with that, ronincards and random photoshoots and commissions... this,ll be busy but awesome.
During the time he was with Karine a lot, he was repeating to his ex girlfriend, Melissa how much he DIDN't want to go back with her (her ex... he was dating her 7 years ago... he had been with erika for over 6 years almost)
But since the last month, he was over here to sleep once a week.... all the erst of the time was at melissa's place..
Mom asked him when he's moving out, he said "in a few days"
does he really mean it? he spends his time at Melissa's place... days, nights and cmoes back jsut to refresh in the pool with her on super hot humid days we recently had.
For my part, my often at jm's place... mom and dad keep being mad for not warning them about when we'll cme back... now I feel BAD for hanging out at my boyfriend's lpace and my OWN future place...
My brother starts physiotherapy for his kyst in his wrist monday so he syas he'll come back only monday night... he says he'll sleep at mel's place until saturday and saturday he's going camping with her...
but he's not telling us anything about it. mom kind of worries since he keeps playing around with these girls and then kicking them out... Melissa had also been sad and crying because he was seenig her as a friend and nothing else... he told us he'd NEVER EVER go out with her ever again... she was too fat (she's chubby jsut like me, if not LESS than me)
anyways... this is all starting to piss me off since my parents laugh at me when I get back home "OMGEEE we have a daughter? I thought she was dead!" and all that crap... grrr
mom looks mad, buys food for everyone yet she has to throw everything away because my brother's not here to eat it...
What she used to do on her own when we were kids was looking great. She was constantly making up competitions with me to have more fans than I did. While my goal is not fame, I never really cared.
Numerous times people had no idea I could draw and they were venerating her and it has never made me feel negative. I enjoyed my art because I knew I was good and it was making me feel relief when I practiced it.
Over the years, she studied arts in college and did like me, open a DeviantART account. My good friend Draven also did open an account: he's a B&W portrait photographer. A very good one too.
That other friend is a painter to begin with. Over the years, Draven and I had always developped similar talents. We do graphic arts, photography and even draw together (or he watches me do it rather than together). We spend awesome time together doing lots of artsy things. We spend almost a whole evening and night shopping art stores and painting on his clothes as well as some of mine. He even made me necklace. We could've spent the night doing that! we stopped at 3 am because I was working 1 pm that same day ;^^
Since we've been doing LOTS of things together: I was his graduation photographer, he hungs some of my art pieces on his walls, we do free art exchanges (ID's and others) as well as photoshoots, that other girl's been trying to do just like us...
She seems to feel a bit out of position and has been doing what we have.
Draven and I were administrators on a graphic art forum and were hiring graphic artists. She sent her application but her work was far from being what we were looking for. She lacked kowledge of photoshop and never bothered taking more than 5 minutes on a piece. We refused her application.
We were insulted and told not to understand the principals of arts because of it. Not only was she not working clean, but she was not even using filtres and her edges were sharp. There were no special effects to make her work stand out unique.
She was mad not to do like us and to be as good. She thought because she was a friend she could do it? it never worked that way. She always wanted fame and being known. She used to write her DA account URL in BARS! yes in BARS on the billiard boards.
she wants us to call her by her artist name, which I don't do because I've known her before being this heartless freak. Even I am not ALWAYS called Jaya besides by her or those who known me through her.
I started using digital art, she has too. I got a wacom tablet, she decided she wanted one too. Yet she has no means to use it since her number 1 well worked media is traditionnals.
She says she has knowledge of photoshop, but school taught her basics... nothing better than self taught for 8 years like me. If you can't use it to its full potential or at least 80%, it's not knowledge, it's trial and error to me.
Now that my friend and I have been asked many times for portrait photoshoots for numerous companies or graduations and even personnal ones, she has done the same with her only friend you could consider a "model". A goth girl.. this means only one type of photo is made and with no variety. The person who have been appraoch for them, are also the same type as her previous one.
I find it sad... just SAD that she feels the constant need to surpass Draven and I...
How can you live happily in your own art if you only appreaciate being on the top and being the best? without even looking down at your things and say "my art looks great, I should be proud to be as good as I am"
a real artist does it for fun and especially because it makes them feel better. I've never met artists that are looking for COMPETITION besides her.
Wanting to be the best is okay, but doing like the others just to surpass them even though you have 0 idea on how that thing works...
she made business card once, and she did everything against the principles of visual graphic arts... some elements were dominant that shouldn't be (you're asking this to a previous graphic designer). She starts graphic design where I studied it 3 years ago... yet it has NOTHING to do with what she believes. then she says she can design things, but it's strict and mostly newspaper designing or similar things... not messed up things in photoshop like YOU want to do them... it'S all about working for someone else: doing things YOU don't want, but what OTHERS want you to...
doing things against your heart so to speak. That's why I dropped it.
so yeah... I needed to get that out. all I can do is criticise her work and suggest her some things to get better.
I had the biggest day ever today....
1. I get to school and am given a customer.... Melanie Trudel. She cancels but gives her appointment to her friend, Yannie.
2. Yannie comes in, witht eh surprise, she's 15 years old accompanied by her mom. Her mom sits behind me ALL the way during the hair fixing procedure.... coming up in my mind "it feels like I'm being watched..."
- her job was to REDO the blonde stripes she had done in FEBRUARY! She had a 2 inches long ROOT! WTH?!?! They were specially made ones too so it was hard to find them all... So I use a bleach on the roots to lighten them up as equally as possible... once done, I rinse alll the thing and use a hair cleasing cream shampoo...
- I put on a 20 minutes semi-permanent color (Shade EQ) of 09GB color (butterscotch). once done, I re-reinse her hair out, clean them up, condition them, treat them... I sit her back, cut her hair and bangs... once done, I straighten her hair like she wanted. Satistfied, she leaves giving me 5$ tip that paid my lunch...
3. lunch: a can of coca cola and a small cherry Jello.
I take my 45 minutes break and get back to class at 2 pm... school ends at 3. I sart working on my quadrant hair color corrections and prepare to clean up.
4. Tommy does Caroline's hair, a streak she wants blue for st-jean-baptiste... BUT asks everyone in the class: "can you finish, my boyfriend's coming to pick me up..." COME ON!!! never start something you CAN'T finish.
I decided to finish the job... I got to know her and we get along a hell a lot! I made a new friend it seems! :P Once done, it was 3:45 pm... I drove her to her boyfriend's place because she had gigantic heavy bags to carry. I go home, but get stuck in a full lot of traffic...
5. I get home at 5 pm, eat dinner.
6. right after dinner, I had to cut my brother's hair!
7. once THAT was done, I had to dye mom's roots!
8. Once done, it's 8:30 pm... I go to my aunt to talk a bit and come back to watch the end of a show with mom.
9 and HERE I $%&&?%*"/$&" AM!!!
now someone says I don'T deserve to sleep! it's 10:49 pm!!!
I'm working at 8 in the moning and 8:30 sunday... x_x I have an exam tuesday and am off monday, but working.
hairdressing is funa nd you don't see the time pass AT ALL! which is why I like physically active jobs like that ^^
I'm also getting MY hair done next thursday, and going back another time for my streaks to be silver. it's a more than one time job to bleach hair at that lvl without burning them off.
anyways... as for now, I'm heading to BED after putting my clothes away x_x had no time for ANYTHING o.o
hair tips? ask me.
On other news.... nothing XD school ends soon and I'm reeeeaaally tired of it! I like school, but I'm not a morning person.
-Personal Info :star:
~Name: Jessica
~Height: 5'2"
~Weight: could be healthier
~Birthday: Feb 8
~Birthplace: St-constant, Quebec/canada
~Current Location: Delson, QC/CA
~School/Grade: Professionnal: secretary diploma and currently earning hairdressing
~Zodiac Sign: Aquarius
~Chinese Zodiac Sign: Cat/Rabbit/hare
~Righty or Lefty: Righty
~Haircolor: dark brown with red
~Eyecolor: blueish green
~Skin Color: qhite pink
-About You
~What's Your Family Situation (Parents, Siblings, etc): parents together and I have an older brother
~Any Pets: one
~If So What Are They: pikachu the cat
~Favorite Relative: my grand aunt and grandma
~Least Favorite Rlative: mom's assholes brothers and sisters and my other grandma
~What's Your Heritage/Race: pure quebecker.... bu tHEY come from french
~Political Affilation: this is a good question to start debates
-Love and Sex :p
~Sexuality: Straight, but loooooves women and finds them to be a good turn on
~Are You In A Relationship Now: I am ^^
~If So, With Whom: Jean-Mathieu, aka WOLF or aka j-m
~For How Long: 5 years and 4 months as of today, june 5 ^^
~Are You In Love?: I am, and am more and more
~Do You Have A Crush On Anyone: wolfu! :D
~Ever Had A Crush On Someone Of The Same Sex?: I don't have "crushes" on them
~How Old Were You When You Had Your First Kiss?: 15 years old :)
~Virgin?: nope
~If Not, How Old Were You When You Had Sex For The First Time: 15 years old >_>
~Was It Enjoyable?: ya :3 hehe had to tell HIM to shut up and stop worrying about ME
~Where Do You Most Like To Be Kissed?: cheeks, lips, neck and forehead ^^
~Best Love Quote?: "don't worry, I'll always be there to help you"
-Your Friends
~Best: Sometimes I wonder if she is MY best friend or just not the other way around...
~How Many Do You Have?: real ones can be counted on a hand
~Love Them All?: I do :)
~Any You Wish You Were Closer To?: as long as they're important to me, it's all that matters :)
~Oldest?: Valery
~Newest?: Kim
~Pen Pal?: hm?
-This Or That :giggle:
~Boxers or Briefs?: boxers on men
~Thongs or G-Strings?: thongs D:
~Shorts or Pants?: depends... both are very nice ^^
~Shoes or Barefeet?: shoes :D
~Books or Movies?: Movies!!! -hates reading-
~Night or Day?: Both for different reasons :D
~Dark or Light?: Light ^^ 100% angel's side
~Mountains or Beach?: both in different situations
~Snow or Sun?: SUN!!! I'M SO SICK OF SNOW!
~Pepsi or Coke?: pepsi
~Guys or Girls?: guys
~Swim or Surf?: swim :D
-For Or Against :poke:
~Gay Marriage?: for, simply because if "I" feel the need to get married, why wouldn't they have it too?
~Abortion?: for. sometimes things happen at a wrong time even with as much precautions as possible... and when you have a chance of making achild live a good life LATER, or make him live in garbage right now.... I'd rather not have a child suffer from my mistakes OR not get things he could have simply because I was impatient. oh, there's also agression reasons.
~Bush Getting Re-elected?: 100% against...this man is crazy =.=
~Suicide?: against... life is full of ups and downs... it's a normal thing to go over them
~War?: 500% against
~Pants?: for, sometimes things are not good to see... X_x
~Clothes In General?: depends what.. I'm not really FOR young teenager's fashion
~Penises?: why would we be against THAT.... it's a source of life afterall!
-Favorites
~Color: red, pink, green and white
~Number?: 3 and 8
~Holiday?: st-jean-baptiste!
~Season?: summer!!!!
~Movie?: can't come up with one..
~Book?: les sept jours du talion by patrick senecal
~Magazine?: Elle QC
~Food? Italian
~Drink?: p0rnstar :D
~TV Show?: HOw it is made or Hantise
~Song?: none comes up
~Band?: Nightwish
~Computer Game?: WoW
~Video Game?: Final fantasy series
~Anime/Manga?: FMA, GW and priness tutu
~Shirt?: open shoulders but long like a tunic
~Pants?: clean black oes
~Actor?: Jerry O'connel :)
~Actress?: Hale Barry (sp?)
~Singer?: Anette from Nightwish
~Flower?: The lotus
~Scent?: the lotus, vanilla and peach
~Animal?: lynx
~Cookie?: mr. christie's chocolate chip cookies!
-About Future :innocent:
~Want To Go To College?: nope, already tried and failed
~What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?: a hairdresser and open my own salon! hopefully be able to raise my kids well
~Want To Get Married?: of course I do, I have the most wonderful man on earth, how can I NOT want kidsa dn get married with him ^^
~Want To Have Kids?: see above answer!
~What Would Their Names Be?: it's hard, because it's a two person's decision ^^ he likes older names, I like special ones... girl: Nessa, Van, Jaihla, Amélia or Axelle ... boy: Yue, Gabriel, Loucka
~How Many?: 2, maybe a girl and a boy? boys would be fine by me though :)
~Where Do You Want To Live?: on the countryside!!
~Where Do You Want To Get Married?: in my natal church... so much as been held there that's important to me...
~How Do You Want To Die?: The way God planned me to die
-More Stuff About You
~Piercings?: used to have!
~Tattoos?: 3 hopefully more :)
~Smoke?: nope, except in raree occasions but I'll do my best not to from now on
~Drink?: when I go out, always a glass or two
~Do Drugs?: rarely
~Skinny Dip?: no I guess
~Greatest Fear?: spiders, insects, deep water and wide pitch black places
~Chocolate or Vanilla?: vanilla
~Go To Church?: not really
~Religion?: Christian
~Scars?: on each legs, a few on my fingers and hands
~CDs Owned?: lots
~Collections?: trinkets
~Like To Be Naked?: only in my shower
~Ever Eaten Sushi?: ye, and I don't like it
~An Entire Case Of Oreos?: YES scarey huh?
~Been On Stage?: ya
~Danced In The Rain?: yes
~Kissed Someone Of The Same Sex?: a peck, nothing more
~Weirdest Dream?: I was preggy and everyone agreed... it WAS a dream, that's for sure!!
~Best Dream?: aaaaah! my imagination can be wide
~Saddest Dream?: someone dying on me and feeling so realy I was confused when I woke up.
~Dream You Most Wish Would Come True?: to be in a different world then our own with more action and supernatural things :D
~Think You're Attractive?: I'm an okay person.. no one flirts with me :P
~Shoplifted?: hm?
~Been Caught "Doing Something"?: almost
~Weirdest Makeout Place?: by the shore in a car at 2:30 am on a christmas party?
~Like Thunderstorms?:I HATE them... they scare me to death
~Favorite Shoes?: skate ones
~Favorite Quote?: holly crap!
~Best Advice Given?: doing it step by step saves you a lot of time
~Worst Advice Given?: no clue o.O;
~Favorite Song Lyric?: eeeh
~What Quote Says Most About Your Life?: -shrugs-
~Glad This Is Over?:yes!!!!!
5 People You Tag?: none!
his computer, alarm clock and my tooth brush >_>
his internet will be connected thursday, as wel as his grocery should be done this week (or so he says) so by the end of next weekend he'll be officially living there :)
it's a very nice place! I love it there!
it's the second block from the corner of the main road, and the street is facing the mall! the convenient store and mall are 2 minutes by WALK away and he's right by the highway. he's also 2 km away from his job :)
all this for not taht much money when you think about it (keeping personnal price and all, anyways it changes from town to cities as well as provinces and states, so it's not an important matter). He also gets to have enough place for two acrs to fit in his parking lot :D and we can park in FRONT of the building.
he's facing the arena, pool, and a school. this means he has a lot of things to do sports!
But the interior is what I prefer.
When you enter the building, he's the second appartment, in a half basement. you get down 4 stairs, turn right and you're at the door.
Once you get inside, you havea corridor goin right with the bathroom a meter away from the front door. then on the left, the washing machines. a little down the corridor, you get his room on the right, rather big one I gotta mention.
a meter away from that you enter nthe main area,m the kitchen that is slightly on the left, a counter seperating the kitchen and the living room (which has a couch, a big storage furniture and his HUGE dinner table).
Then on the left corridor you have at the end his hobby room... where he has his computer and everything else.
it's very cute and the colors don't need to be changed, they look great.
I wish I could'Ve been with him and not use HIS things... because when you think about it, everything is HIS... When I move in with him in a year or half a year, nothing is "mine" in there... if we ever split up, I lose everything AND everything I have at my parent's.... when I move out, they wont be keeping anything for me "just in case" and I'll have to start over.
though I wont think about that. I love his place and I wish I could consider it mine as well... but tghe fact that he pays for every single things and everything in there is of his property, I could never say it's my "home" unless he lets me act as if it was...
but I cleaned some things for him today if I can atleast do that to help him set up in his home.
So, I skipped school 3 days and can now go back feeling better. thursday people were mad at my teacher and were far from being confident enough to work on men customers... they got on my nerves AND when I told them a lady called to be a cusomter for the color correction exam, every single student ignored me... I went back tot eh reception frustrated and told Jessica (a girl from my class) how frustrated I was to be looked at as if I needed to shut to fuck up and take my things and scram... AND being ignored. She took the paper, went in class and told people. a girl took the name for her exam... that same person who told me to fuck off with her eyes... it frustrated me. So I took my things, went to see my teacher and principal and told them I was leaving...
friday, I had no intension of enduring all of this on ANOTHER customer's day... I decided to stay home... same for today, but even with more sleep I couldn't get up... me wanting to help jm clean was too strong even though he says he disagree ;;^^ he told me not to skip anymore until it's finished for summer. (a little less than 2 weeks)
-sigh- I'm still looking for a model for my perm exam... this is getting a hell difficult...
So, Tonight was really a fun night! Some coworkers and I went somewhere to drink something for Sean's birthday. We went to a place outside and it was raining. We had a lot of fun. We then left to eat at Como pizzeria before I drove sean, frank and julie back home (as we live a few streets away, all 4 of us)
on our way there, we were stuck in a alcohol control barrage... yeah and we DID drink earlier...
whe stopped us, I opened my window and he came VERY close to my face and asked if we had drank. I answered "nope"
but realizing how suspect it looked to say no in a car full of 20 years old people at 2: 30 am... I added "well they drank a glass or two, but I'm driving them back home"
the police officer that was rather cute asked "are you in condition to drive" and I said "Sure am!" and he let us go.
I dropped Sean at his house and came back... on my way to the corner where the police were, a guy let a lady pass after the test..., BUT she took the WRONG WAY! she went straight towards me on the other dside of the road that is seperated!!!! I looked at julie and add "and she was let go after passing the test? She acted as if it was okay...."
now I'm here and going to bed XD
I mentionned in my DA journal that I might go with coworkers to see melanie on her mom's funeral tuesday. She had brain sugery done the other day and everything was fine and the surgery went perfectly with no harm as told... The next morning is when things got worst. She had a heart attack followed by a "ACV," or "AVC" however you call it. She was only 48 years old and leaves behind her own boyfriend, her 25 years old daughter and her 5 years old grand daughter...
its really hard on everyone at work that knew nher, and her husband and daughter. We had no idea something like it could've happen. Melanie's pregnant too and she was stressed and almost lost it... I hope she,ll do fine nontheless regardless her mother's gone now... it'll be really hard for her. We will got ehre to give her our condoleances an sympathies....
so,I'm off to sleep!!! :)
What didn't I notice? at 8 pm.... 3 hours after my shift and 5 hours since I got home after the bike ride....
My right arm and chest are covered of sunburn XD not mentionning the bits of my nose being reddish XD
While my left arm si fine... wierd huh?
I'm taking some colors.
Mom and dad saw me and pointed my nose "she IS tanning a bit... look at those frekkles that pop up"
whua XD my frekkles are coming back o.o
but seriously, I was all fine when I felt heat on my right arm and noticed I was lobster red!
and I thought: WTH I was alright for the past 5 hours! Once this sunburn'S gone, I'll have a nice shade ot my arms :)
while my legs will stay as white as ever -_- next time : sun screen!!!
My friends wanted to do something tonight and left me a message at 10:30: they were downtown and told me to go meet them. I refused for obvious reasons... it was 11:20 and I'd have tp drive 25 mninutes to go and another 25 to come back. All this to stay for 15 minutes because they'll want to go home by that time.
Here in quebec, gaz is 1,39 cents/LITRE
when it costs 55 to full my car's tank instead of my old 40, I CAN'T afford to go there. I go to that exact palce 5 mornings/week and come back 5 afternoon/week... this means with traffic, 1hour 35 minutes everyday... it's a bit moer than a full tank/week.
On all this, I need to go to work. And working to pay my gaz, orthodontist and soon vacation expenses AND cell phone, it's practically most I can afford of extra is a 40 to 60$ every week for school things, food, and going out. Most of it already used since yesterday...
All of my friends don't have this problem. They'Re smar students to go to college or University and their school's been finished for 2 weeks. They worked the last 2 weeks full time. Others have NO SCHOOL at all and work every week to earn money...
I'm the only one still in school and the only one working on saturdays and sundays.
¸feels great huh? I NEVER get to see my friends...when I can, nthey don't want to because they fall asleep, when they an they do things far not taking in consideration my hard labord.
Here's my weekly schedule that's been going around for the past 2 months.
Sunday: Working all day
no one available in the evening to do anything. need to get ready for monday's school
Monday: school all morning and afternon: work all evening
Tuesday: School all day, evening extension classes
wednesday: school all day, working in the evening
thursday: school all day and... OMFG A FREE EVENING!!!!!!!! /%??*""$?%/"?% Q/%Y?*N /%"&* HAPPY
Friday: school all day, working in the evening
Saturday: working either all day or all evening. If so, some bike with jm in the day, in the evening, getting choked by most friends because they eat at rich'S time.é... aka 9 pm dinners that last long and forever, leaving little time before to go sleep = this means noithing because I'm working the next day.
see? when the HELL do I get to see people and have a good social life? My friends are not close in the week... they live away OR don't want to come down here...
-sigh- And they didn't want to see Valery tonight. While the girl wanted to see them, they easily told her to fuck off and do things on her own. not inviting her. oh, and at 11;20, they were talking behind her back when I called.
friends you call them?
parents deserve this.
I'm 20 years old and my brother is 22. We're both working and paying our own expenses to let them live as best as they can. Sadly the house's been the biggest thing to pay and they can never put a few bucks aside or get anything as it was the biggest luxury they gave us for the past 4 years.
My brother is not very pleased with this idea... on the contrary, he loves his luxurious life of having a huge TV, big room and lots of space covered of dirty clothes and wires and all the likes in his room. (aka his room's a total dump... you don't see the floor AT ALL!)
For the past 2 months, mom and dad have been trying to get him to clean it up for pictures and for people to visit once it's for sale.
and...? he's never done it. Not that it's a crime, but he's not doing it for one reason that he tells everyone but us: he doesn't want to move so he's being an ass and not cleaning a mm of it. Just so the house looks horrible and not presentable.
he cares about himself only on this... not thinking about mom and dad's hard work for us and just wanting ONCE IN A LIFETIME, somethign for themselves to enjoy.
Today, surprise when I get up at 10... mom and dad with 5 garbage bags, are cleaning his room from A to Z and putting away all his clothes that's lying down to the garbage!
everything's he's been wearing for work he doesn't need anymore is also put away.
I want to see the end result of that cleaning AGAIN.
so other thasn that yesterday I went to Montreal's Casinoo with a coworker who turned 18 sunday. she liked it, but I brought her because she likes to buy lotery tickets already. Everytime she works... She likes the look of the casino alot and it's VERY surprising, but she gets tired of it. One thing I manage to do... decieve her of playing too much!!! :D we didn't win anything at all XD
and today, we're going to parc jean drapeau again, or longueuil, where I study (far away). Parc Jean Drapeau is where the Grand Prix is... jun 8 is canada's grand prix.
so yeah D: a nice place to see and david said there are activities today. that's why we might go.
so, gotta go finish my hair and eat, toodles!!
I had an appointment today and some good news came up. I'm done with my bottom palate! THey blocked the hole with a metal wire so it wont move until the top part is done. The top is smaller somehow even if we have stretched the top at the same time. I have an appointment on July 1 to see when I'm completetly done with the expanders.
I'll probably be a few months with them in even without expanding so it gets used to it. But my orthodontist, Henry, said things and my dentist, dental surgeon and also orthodontic (the one verifying EVERYTHING that's being done) said we'd get the braces installed by the end of the summer... is it possile? or am I really going to have to stick with these for 6 more months?
we'll see. But it's a good news that the bottom is finished for now! I saw the before shape of my palates and I must say there's a very big difference from back then to right now :)
I can'T wait to feel the space in my mouth once they're out!
and not to mention that instead of expanding 2 times a week, I gotta do it every 2 days. ex: Thursday, saturday, monday, wednesday, friday, sunday, etc... 4 times a week to speed up and to make the top fit the bottom :)
SCHOOL: Things are getting better socially. Lea's boyfriend dumped her this weekend and I wrote her a cute mesage on facebook... somehow, since she noticed I care een if she hated me, she realized I wasn't such a bad person and so did Tommy. Tommy today made a joke and even kissed my cheeks. Something I was far to expect if you remember they were both ignoring me for the past 2 weeks.
my inspiration and motivation is coming back :) I hope it'll stay like this now.
MEN HAIRCUT: Hate the hair that falls in my shirt... it's itchy. But my graduations are done well and I just need to concentrate more on the shapes. It's a real art to cut men's hair... it requires a lot of sight since everything needs to be perfect in LOOK. short hair show way more mistakes than long ones.
COLOR CORRECTION: hopefully I learn more to fix marilyne's hair... I also have to redo my dark brown and roots AND the red's roots. Once I find the silver I'm looking for or try the one I have, i'll put the red SILVER! :)
PERM: hate it... I have NO model for my exam and the requirements are standard perms, so short to mid-short hair... my aunt got hers done last month!!!! But my friend suggested to do it for me if I couldn't find anyone.. if I do, I'll make a lousse perm that wont make her look like a sheep XD
LEUCHEMIA: I might go monday, shave teenager's head in a highschool for leuchemia... one of their mates suffers of it and they decided to organize a day for it. Many kids will do it too! if it's not monday, it'll be on june 17 :)
so far it's pretty much it. I'm hoping that I can easily finish my project tomorrow night :) I need to go and print photos!! XD
Saturday I spend the day at work as usual but in the evening we were choked again. our friends let us down... But we called Theo to do something last minute worth. We went to see Narnia 2. A pretty good movie, I loved it, but could've been better somehow :)
Sunday, slept a little and left for work at 8 am to 1 pm. after that jm, stephanie, her sister, madgin, valery and I went to do some bike... We left my place to meet mad, steph and her sis at the bridge.... boat crossing station. Getting there, the gate was closed and the bridge was up with a boat to pass. We waited for it to pass and GOD I LOVE BOATS. I was amazed by it's HUUUUUGE size and seeing it from so close made me shiver!!! I LOVE IT! I always wish I could visit commercial boats and see the engines and make a tour from every corner.
We crossed the bridge and took the isle in the middle of st-lawrence river ALLLL the way to the parc jean-drapeu (where the grand prix circuit is (circuit gilles villeneuve). We went all the way around the circuit and came home. But coming home was hard. We could see the rain coming and flys and insects kept on biting us. We were covered of them byt the end of the ride! In total: 42 km.
We were right beside Montreal's Casino. If I hda my camera I could've taken tons of pitures of the city's shore. We're kind of far from the shore I live, but there, we were right beside it.
It was really fun. Then, we ate at Val's for the last time before she moves somewhere else. We got home and I slept. In the morning I got up and since it was raining this morning Steph, madgin and jm and I went to do some shopping.
this summer's fashion is horrible so I didn't buy anything... just a CD of trance music called Euphoria :) (contains 3 CD's) I could've taken clubber's guide 08, but it was 40,99$ fuck off at that price X
I went to work after that from 5 to 11 and here I am now.
tomorrow, I have some projects to finish and work on and then I need to full my car of gaz and full my tires of air as well. it's lacking overal more than 6 pounds of air in each tire. not too good. I just need to remember where I put my air gauge the other day -.- that's me -_- forgetting as easily as 2 seconds after doing something...
that's it for now! I have exension class tomorrow afternoon too!
Mom wasn't used to it as well ^^ we did 3 street turns (our street's a big square)
and we had a lot of fun when it was dark!
then, I tried my new bike that jm got me ^^ it works wonderful. it took me a while to understand how tot ake the breaks off to take the front wheel out to put it in my car but I managed to after 10 minutes :)
I'm going to his place tonight!
So right now, I'm on to check on some stuff and should be going to take my shower and wash my hair.
My job also has new shifts... like sunday, my shift is 8 am to 1 pm... but SUPERVISOR!
it's usually 9 to 3 and 11:30 to 6 and the last one 3 to 11 on weekends :) but it's nice this way! small shift, and I get my whole afternoon off!!
Not to mention next saturday... I'm supervisor in the evening but instaed of doing to regular 3 to 11 that cuts my day in half like mad on SATURDAY: my shift is 5 to 11!!!! I have my whole afternoon OFF!!!
hehehehe
AND this weekend is a 5 days off weekend. Our men's class was canceled friday. and monday is patriot's day ANd we have a free day tuesday... I have hair extension class but that's in the late afternoon.
I'll do my best to sleep tomorrow OR monday or tuesday.
so overall a nice time. I might get my sense back from school happenings easier this way. Today wasn't a good day for me x_x I'm also in SPM which made me quite agressive when it didn't work... sadly x_x I guess some people were mad at me for searching all around myself. The shop guy wasn't there so we didn't have access to our things. I needed stuff and had to do with thing that were NOT working... so my arms are orange and red now -_-
-sigh- anyways. hopefulyl everything will be alright next week :)
oh and I have no MODEL for my Standard PERM exam... damnit -_-
In october, they took a break since erika was acting as if she kept finding stupid excuses to not see my brother. They had to go on a trip this summer. But my brother's job didn't go as planned. he was stopped for a month so he had no incomes. He paid his bills (car , insurance and phone) with the money he savec up for the trip.
Because of it, he can't go! But it's not the problem. She came home tonight because they had to go to the restaurant. She never said hi and was feeling crappy. My brother asked her what was wrong and she said "I don't want to tell you" and he mentionned this:
"I know what the fuck is wrong, it's not working anymore and you're just not telling me anything. Now stop lying and once you walk out that door, if you do, you're never coming back, never calling here, or on my phone forever again"
without hesitation, she turned back and walked out.
She's been like this for a very long time, if not a year or more. They've been together for 5 years and a half. She was constantly finding excuses for him not to go sleep over or to not see him. like "I need to sleep" or "my mother wants a family meeting" which never ever happened.
so to continue with the trip, she said she wanted to go THIS SUMMER and was offered in the winter instead so he could save up again. Mr's didn't want to wait.
So one of thw two weeks off my brother took, since he canceled the other one to work, he told her they would visit the entire Gaspésie together. But she announced that she decided to go to the tip with her younger sister (who is my age)
during the ONLY week they'd ever be together in the whole year. she never got along wiht her sister either... that's the worst!
So my brother got on his heels and put his pants on. He gave her everything she wanted, paid restaurant every week if they could be together, drove her everywhere, paid movies, hotel rooms, EVERYTHING. without being grateful somehow.
He's feeling like crap but he's realizing he lost time. They have NO 0% point in common too.
Erika is a really nice girl I enjoyed talking with. Only we all knew ssomehow she seemed to use my brother... or maybe she never realized how lucky she was and was pretending to love him while trying to avoid him.
kind of stupid if you ask me.
PS: va pas parler de ca a mon frere jm, parcqu'y va se sentir vraiment mal... yé triste, parcqu'il l'aime érika mais a l'a niaiser... évitons le sujet avec lui. MERCI! :) j'taime fort!
Marilyne and I decided to go to SkySpa in Quatrier DIX30 today :) we also shop some time and I bought 2 t-shirts.
skyspa was wonderful, relaxing and fun.
We got there, were given a reusable water bottle, locker key and all the likes. We changed, left for the palce that was on a ROOF TOP! we went into the sauna 15 minutes, went outside since the nordic waterfall wasn't working today (sadly... it was freshly painted). We relaxed, went to lay down on pillows into a relaxing room with a view of the world in videos with calm music everywhere.
Then, we went into the vapor bath. It was HOT AS HELL BUT SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO COOL!!!!!!
then we went to take a cold shower, and went in the jacuzi. we almost fell alseep so we went to lay down on a chair under the shining sun and blu sky!
we went to take a nap into the relaxing room again and we read while watching people walk all around the quartier DIX30.
we went to eat, and then shop :) we wnated to make a plushie! but we will some other time, even though I wish I could make one and recieve it as a gift. I want it to be jm and I's baby! :D since we don't have any of our own. and they have this cuuuute sailor uniform!!! and shoes, and animals... XDDDDDD
so that was my day. i need to clean now, and DRINK
it was incredibly boring in the morning just to figure out how to get everything to work, which class to use because one is unavailable and should be renewed starting tomorrow... it can't be used!
and then, we had a customer that ditched our plans... we canceled the others and really started working at only 12 pm... I did a whole cut, others did two (but I had a graduated neckline to do unlike them because I was sick friday and skipped class)
and everyone was tired and mean to each other... somehow, marilyne and Christine and I were not!
Tommy said a really misplaced comment on me and he thought we never heard it... a friend that backstabs you is no fun. and so all day we talked about it (the girls and I)
and I told him how it hurted as a comment and how it was misplaced for someone who had been said my friend and said he loved me. He said I could take it anyway I want and almost made me go take a walk!!
The girls thought it wasn't a good thing.... we never talked for the day and there had been a cold feeling since the last month somehow... I don't know why, they don't like me anymore for doing whatever i don't know... they believe they're the best all the time and I believe Lea is walking onto Tommy and making him feel bad... her hair is cool so let's give LEA credit while TOMMY was the one who did it.
anyways... I get home after picking up my schedule and believing frieds like taht don't deserve better than hate and recieve a facebook message sayingg how sorry he was and how he never meant it. He said he was ready to apologize in front of the girls. well a message is rather coward... and acting as if it never happened would be worst. So I wont reply and wait for real life apology :) I was kind enough to tell him kindly that I heard and that it was mispalced and disrespectful, and he reacted like a 5 year old! he's 22... not 5 !
I'm REALLY different from them in what I like and how I am... but I'm still human and adult. I know waht they know regarding hairdressing and have the same capabilities and abilites :)
other than that I have my new glasses and marilyne did red stripes in my hair!!! it looks so awesome!! XD
Saturday I spent my day playing some games outside with jm :) it was pretty fun. I went to work and allll evening was rather boring. But I was SUPPOSED to see madgin and his gf... they said we'd meet up at 11:30 at my house. I get home at that time, and couldn't join them... their cell phone wouldn't work. each of them's. It turned 12:30... and jm got home and asked me to go take a walk. I knew they decided not to come and see me. And worst is, they didn't call and jm said he'd tell me because they were afraid to disapoint me...
well making me wait ONE hour while I could've gone to bed because I worked the next morning wasn't the smartest idea...
I'm the only one fucking working in the weekend and they never thought about that little thing. so it made me really mad... and I still am somehow. I haven't seen friends in WEEKS... Theyu had fun while I worked and choked on me without telling me.
jm and I took a walk, talked, and got back home. I wanted to talk but he wanted to sleep so kind of mad, I went to sleep myself. woke up the next day, went to work.
got home, we took a walk together for 3 hours. And we went to eat at the restaurant for dinner.
and I drew when he left home, all night long and slept a lot. I'm here now, after drawing a bit more.
An ordinary decieving weekend this time :( how can feel loved by your friends when they're scared to decieve you AND they choke on you... they could've called me ALL evening and tell me to forget about it and we'd do something another time... no one took the time to call me. Shows how much I worth for my friends...
-sigh-
oh well. other than that, my cold is getting better... I've been home from wednesday through friday to sleep.
and I reached 30 000 pageviews on DA
travel less, but it costs us a bunch of wallets to pay a bit of gaz!
today, it raised to 1,35$ CA/ LITRE!
in U.S.A, the price is almost similar but listed for A GALON.
isn't it USA who'S having a god damn hard time financially? but OURS costs three times more than THEM! and yet we're less of a car user than they are.
I believe it to be way too high. and there was a law that passed saying petrol companies had to justify their every raise of charges... yet WHY does it raise during VACATIONS and not during jthe normal working weeks?
I don't believe they're giving real excuses. they're jsut ripping us from our money. I) can't travel any other way to school but by car unless I pay the same price for a bus pass and spend 4 hours to go and come back EVERY DAY. emaning work less because I CAN't be in time to work ANd can't get money to pay that pass as well or my regular important payments.
see? there's no way we'll get out of life alive... electricity raised, cars licences and plates are raising, everyday life things are raising, minimum salary is raising, BUT MY FUCKING SALARY IS N.O.T. I repeat FUCKING NOT raising at ALL!
people's salary is coming close to mine and we can have 3 years of difference of service o<in the company, is THAT normal? is it normal everything raises of 2 dollars because people are paid more but I'M NOT? I don't believe it's fair and it's getting on my fucking nerves to see how most people are being ripped off and made poor... and they expect us to like western traditions? gaz will almost be 2$ the litre in 2 months... grocery costs a minimum of 160$ every week (MIMINUM) and can reach 350 for a regular 4 people family... to to mention school and babysitting expanses and others. I WANT kids and will have kids regardless of the costs, but it's still not fucking fair to let our kids live in a ripper community like this... they have hosues of a million worth dollars and we can barely pay one considering the interest rates... -sigh- life's nhard for a student...
But it's been sunny and warm for a whole week!!! no rain!!!
There were temperatures aroun 20 degress celcius... I walked around in my flip flops, skirt and tank top this week! my car burns from the inside and jm even caught a bad sunburn!
it was APRIL 15!!! and april 1, we still had a bunch of snow!!
Though it's getting chillier in the next fe days, it stays above the 15 celcius. which is good.
But, since it's cold in the night and VERY warm in the day, I caught a cold... I've been sick since friday and have been feeling the worst friday and tonight.
I'm congestionned and feel my lungs and bronchitis sore as hell. I caught and they feel like they're killing me.
But I'll be fine if I rest, tomorrow.
but tommorrow I gotta clean my room to take pics and for it to be clean for people to visit in the evenualities of selling the house. I also have to cut my brother's hair -_- when I can, he can't... luckily I brought my stuff from school.
I also need to sleep A LOT. I'm heading there actually... mom's still up and it's 12:10... downloading music now that dad showed her how it works -_- she's usually in bed at 10:30 pm! wth... at least she understands me for being on my computer longer at night :P
she'll be tired as hell! oh well, I bought some full throttle... she can take one XD
nighties!
So, I bought rollerblades today. The last time I had a pari was my brother's old cheap plastic blades. I was 8 back then.
So today, I got a pair that cost me 300$ (visa is my friend). It should last me YEARS and they're of high quality and made of big wheels to go faster for strong legged equipped people.
Only after so many years... I kind of had trouble balancing right without loosing equilibrium. And jm said he wanted to go to Dave (a friend)'s place. Hard headed as I was, I FOLLOWED and it's , from what he told me 7 km away from home by taking the routes. Now that snow melted a week ago, the cycling ways are NOT in their best shape... rocks on the road, holes everywhere... I managed to get there in a loooong ride, and fell THREE times.
1. After 10 minutes, I got close to the urbain way and fell down in front of every car there was there. My right knee twisted a bit and it was a tiny bit painful but it got fine right after.
2. Jm took a way I couldn't, and since I was all confused and didn't want him far away because I STILL wasn't fine with my rollerblading, I followed. (that was 25 minutes after leaving home) It was hardish mud and ground, but while I WALKED on it, there was a harder part that made me fall down on my back, and I ripped off some skin on my right elbow. I got up and continued while some idiot in a car horned on me falling (it was a few meters away form ANOTHER big traffic road).
3. Once we got closer to Dave's place, we stopped at a corner to let a car pass, but SHe let US pass...only I saw a hole and decided to avoid it not to fall down, lost equilirium and did a split front to back in FRONT of the girl in her car!!!
That's when I noticed the side of my left knee was bleeding and was full of small rocks. I yelled to jm that once there, I had to desinfect my rather okay wounds before drinking and leaving. We got there, it took a whole hour.
I asked dave's mom for some peroxyde, soap to wash my hands and legs. (I had a skirt with shorts underneath... jm wanted me to hurry and said I'd die of heat in pants XD I have no good looking shorts).
And believe it or not, my knee still has some pain pushes. as well as if I lay my elbow on something. but seriously, doing that first big ride wasn't the smartest idea. my rollerblades are already used and some parts's plastic is already scrachted a lot after less than 24 hours!.
but I still love them and wanna go back. I'll jsut do smaller runs and probably stay around the area while the roads are not clean for sports. and Guylaine said she'd do some with me too :)
I ate for the first time today at 6 PM... I did all the way to dave's home empty stomac... jm came and got me with his car.. he elft with his bike to go back home and came to pick me up.
hurts...
On another thing we did, we went to the cinema tonight to watch two movies.
1. dans une galaxie 2 (awesome movie I WISH was translated or subtitled for the world to watch)
2. Forbidden kingdom
I didn't regret the movies! they were wonderful!
except for those STUPId kids yelling and doing stupid stuff during the second movie... I got up, and went to tell the staff. they shut their mouth at that moment... we told them to shutup and they just laughed. the girl told her they'd kick them out if they got any more complaints of them bothering... I wish she had njust kiked them out right away! they were swearing like their phrases were made of ugly words... it was unbearable to see and onfirm how parents don't raise their kids good behaviors AND good speech in public.
that's it I guess... XD I was sick friday and called off work to sleep today in the morning... that was why I was sick mostly : lack of sleep.
so I'm working tomorrow from 8 am to 5 pm... x_x
Mom says she shouldn't be jealous of other women offering dad stuff (that he refused in the past) if she didn'T love him anymore. So she's all confused. She doesn'T want to live without being liked by his family since dad told them for the third time it's because MOM is confused and she is the one looking like the bad girl and the guilt.
she knows they don'T like her, and she doesn'T want to be forced to see them. but it's his family...
anyways... either way she told me about possibile places we'd live. Since if they split up, dad goes to his mother's by himself because he thinks Al and I wont follow him because he's being frustrated alll the time( I love my dad, I just wouldn't want mom to be alone... I'd be moral support to her). And my uncle's mother might be moving to their place so she'd let us rent her place which has been renewed AND is kind of an ok size with two bedrooms in the basement for my bro and I.
funny thing is, it's the SAME building where I lived back when I was 2 years old! only the appartment beside, but the SAME pattern :) same adress, so I know what it kind of looks like.
it's where I first played nintendo and mario with my parents! where I had hellium balloons for my birthday AND where I had a blackboard in my playroom ^^ where my bro was scared of his wiley coyote and where I had my picture with my bro taken...
and she'd rent cheap. So mom and dad, if they can sell the house for what they'll be asking, will give them 100 000$ in total (if they split up, 50 each) it would be a lot of money aside, to pay debts, live AND get them on vacation at the beach somewhere AND help om get her dental implants. She'd finally be nOT suffering. she had troubles eating tonight (as well as I did) because she had a bruise under her lower partial.
whatever happens, all I want is mom to be happy. Mom deserve happyness and deserves to care for HERSELF. She thought about us, dad and all the family before herself. yougner, she had suicidal problems and was held back form killing herself because she cared about me and Al. She didn'T want us alone, but she has a lot of family issues and was abandonned by her own mother... and her father died she was 14. Mom has in total 12 brothers and sisters, only talks to ONE of them. Tells you how big of a family she has. she talks to her oldest sister, her two cousins and her mother's sister (aunty, the one who's like a grandma to me, i love her).
they'Re like our uncles and aunt and grandma while they're my REAL grandma's sister and uncle and aunt's cousins.
anyways...
If I get a chance to live with mom happily like this, I wont put jm the burden of letting me stay at his place. I'll let him do what he has to do and take his time and buy things he wants before we start our real life living together, and I'll live with my mother for the time I finish up with school :) (who knows maybe she'll bring me on vacation with her ;) hehe kidding)
it'd do her a lot of good for working hard like she does all her life long. she deserves a break for being every company's puppet and slave. She deserves respect and a break.
that's it, it made my day, considering the dy I had was really shitty at school...
It all started thursday night when I played WoW and was given a shooting help by my older brother and his friend who kept sending me loads of money and equipoement and bags. My brother asked me to tell him when I was done playing. I did, and that was only 45 minutes later. I went to bed it was 11:30 pm. (miracle I was in bed so early). I woke up the next day at 1:30 pm! Overall, I started getting to ready to leave at 2, including showering, doing my hair, and packing... I was, as usual, later than expected.
jm and I left for the grocery store at 3:30, we got our stuff, and left for good... we cross Champlain bridge with barely any traffic, keep on heading north on hgwy 15 until BANG! we caught traffic in the root going to hgwy 40... from THERE, south of montreal, to the OTHER SIDE....which means, we were in 2 hours of traffic... it was the time we needed to get there WITHOUT... we arrived at the cottage at 8 pm to be precise. It took the whole trip montreal city to quebec city to get to a place 1hour away, while quebec is 3!
So we passed st-jerome and that's when the traffic stopped, it was already dark. He drove alllll the way there, 78 km to the north, then we reached the "portes du nord" (north doors)... that's when we were surrounded by mountains and the road started going up on them! the view was spectacular, jsut like going to magog, the opposite direction... you're surrounded by loads of forest, lakes and mountains!
I wont go into details, but let me tell you we had a lot of fun and enjoyed our stay... we slept a lot and cuddled. We took a warm bath, played games, watched some tv and stared at the cottages, lake and mountains surrounding us. We listened to the radio while reading the newspaper and, for myself, doodling under the warm shining spring sun...
the evening, we calmed our nerves in the sauna and jumped into a cold shower before heading to bed.
We woke up this morning, took our time to eat lunch (we woke up at 11:30 am...), watched tv ALL afternoon (canal Z, Discovery, serie + and we also watche TMNT's first movie that was playhing on teletoon XD (french)). After that we cleaned up, washed dishes, packed...
THAT'S when I realized something... I wasn't wearing my ring. Being emotionnal and ashamed, I cried a lot... I HAD NO IDEA where I had put it. I had a memory hole... You know? when you think about something you don't want to forget and when the time comes, you forget THAT but not the rest...
I remember taknig it off to wash the dishes because the soap was making it slip off a bit... I thought about putting it in my bra for the time being because I didn't have any pockets, but said no... I thought about the counter but it would've been to easy to lose it... THEN I forgot the rest...
we looked everywhere for it, taking the stove out of his little tiny space, as well as the fridge. JM wasn't mad and I was surprised. He told me to dit down and remember the lsat thing I did, but it was total BLANK. Like I wasn't conscious when I put it somewhere. He said he'd get me another one but that was a NO WAY... expensive AND I only wanted that one... it was special. He told me to unpack everything and look... I did.
It's when I opened my backpack, took the peanut butter and bagels out that I saw my switching glasses case. THEN! I remembered... I had a flash and remmebered putting it in my glasses case that was lying on the table so I wouldn't lose it and if I did, it was still in MY things.
I felt stupid..but I seriously had a big a blank. Things were cut from that single moment. It was the first time I was taking my ring off since jm gave it to me. Believe me, I'm NEVER taking it off again... everytime I take off a jewel he gave me, I ended up losing it, once, twice, three times!
We were on our way home and saw all the lights from houses and cottage in the mountains...it was beautiful! an incrediblde sight! Quite a bit of traffic too...We skipped our exit, ended up in montreal north... He said he was expecting me to guide him. so we took important roads until I saw familiar streets. We went all the way up of montreal and saw mont royal's light cross at less than 1 km. we were on TOP of the island XD so we had to go down! we took st-laurent alllll the way down, but it was the opposite... -.- so We took st-denis to go down, reached Viger street near the congress palace (where otakuthon will be held) and saw an exit sigh to the champlain bridge from the top of the road... we ended up going there by doing a few detours and got ourselves at my place. I'm here now! And off to bed soon XD
it was an incredible weekend to remember. I'd do it anytime again! Not once have we argued or yelled at each other... seemed like everything was fitting perfectly. we never argued about who was cooking, washing the dishes and all! it was sweet.
That's my weekend! I have to go put my room in place to sleep for school in the morning... I also have a shower to take because my hair is oily XD they didn't have shampoo and I didn't bring mine -.-
tudles!
He told my family he wanted good to happen to me on easter. In the last four years, easter's been the worst day of the year...
2004 - my uncle had a severe sudden alergic reaction to peanuts. No one knew was alergic, not even him. ti was his firts time being this way. He came close to dying if my favmily's reflexes to call an ambulance was not fast enough.
2005 - my grand father passed away from his lung cancer on march 28, the night of easter.
2006 - mom's car was hit hard byu a stupid 16 yr old girl without licence... so stupid she was also a young mother who had an accident and had a baby and couldn't abord. She was TRYING to drive and fucking hit the wrong pedal. My cousin's truck was also not working after the engine was squashed from the front crash.
2007 - marie-pier passed away from generalized cancer on march 29, right before easter. She was a 20 year old girl that I knew and was friend with along with other friends.
2008 is finaly the year where things look up on easter, when j-m showed me the ring. It's PRETTY AS HELL. I love it... I never take it out. His is made of titanium. he chose it himself :) he knew what I liked, obviously ^^
I love him. And I do hope spending my life with him.
Gettinengaged was something I dearly wanted, if any of us die sooner than expected, at least I know people wont see me as a simple girlfriend, but as someone more to him and vice versa... if something happens to hm, I want people to know what I feel is true and sincere.
now I g2sleep... toodles! :)
I started watching Full metal alchemist this week. I used to watch it on tv in english and got used to the character's voices in english dub. I really really like it! more than before!
I like the whole alchemy thing now that I read what alchemy really is and how it used to work in the old days and modern alchemy. beliefs and practices too. Seriously, it makes sense in FMA except for the magical stuff. but hey, it's anime, right?
I'm still waiting for mr sun to warm up our place... I can'T wait to go out after school and take a walk in the sun, warm weather with my ipod... XD it'S sunny today but... cold as EVER! no feel of going out.
I'll let things so short as it is, and go sleep. I will be back another time since tomorrow's the closing contest after work.
since I heard WHEN I'M GONE I can't help but to say that they ARE good! I LOVE that song!
I used to be ashamed to know they came from MONTREAL, where I live.
Now, it's the opposite. I might even buy their newest CD
"When I'm gone" by Simple Plan
I love you! congratulations too!!!
He got an answer from the appartment proprio and she accepted to let him rent it! it's wonderful and the place is pretty as hell! not to mention 2 km away from his job and 600 meters from the mall!
it's in a pretty big town with everything he needs!
and it's 20 minutes away from my place, same distance, only more civilized :P
CONGRATULATIONS!!!
happy birthday to Jenn again ^^
and here's about my orthondontic things.
I've been expanding my palates 6 times as of now without any problems. pain? doesn't exist.
eating? no hard food, gum and all but I can eat fine.
disadvantage now? everytime I eat, things get stuck in the metal boxes and wires and I need to get it deeply clean afterwards as muh as I can. I use a special brush to get underneath the boxes and in between wires. But overall, the wire on my right side that used to cut my tongue to blood is now far enough to NOT touch it at all anymore. From what the top palate box shows, I have a about 1 cm of expension done :) it's starting to feel larger a bit and it's starting to move my teeth a bit.
it'S fun ^^ I'm hoping time goes faster now so the result can show faster! not that the pain is gone and all.
everytime mom turns the key to spread out nthe thing, it's a tiny bith uncomfortable like my front teeth want to explode, for 5 minutes. But other than that, it's all gone after that little 5 minutes and it's FAR from being a bd feeling. it's actually something I don't mind feeling! :)
mom doesn't like to crank the top. she has to push hard and FEELS like MY teeth are gonna explode! but it actually doesn't feel as bad as she believes.
Every monday and thursday night after school and her job day, I lay down back on the dinner table, mouth wide open while she looks and pushes the key in to push it foward and activate the mechanism.
like the orthodontist said, it's almost part of me now :)
that's it I guess XD
so here's how my day went at school.
When I reached school, Marilyne gave me a hugehug and handed me a bag with a flower! I OMG SO PRETTY pink flower :) she wrote a letter in which she stated "to the greatest and most special friend I have, Mari"
I was so touched I could've cried :')
the others wished a happy birthdya, gaveme friendly hugs (like i've never had before!)
teachers wished them too, and one even told the new girlks (dep1) about it and they wishedme a happy birthday alllll together :P it was so funny!
All day marilyne was putting happybirthday post-its on my agenda :P she wrote a happybirthday Jess!!!! with post-it for every letter :P she elft screaming HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
When I got there, everyone was in a pack and yelled "happy birthday jess!"
I've neverfelt so appreciated by friends in my whole life ^^
even my older friends, thoseI see the most, haven't called me. besides valery and stph, no-one even bothered sending an e-mail or anything. jm's cousin, valerie did as well as his cousin in law and his sister!
friends often forget such days happen, and it's then that you realize who really does care about you and noticces you when you're present.
it doesn't matter to me if they don't wish it, but ignoring it kind of mnakes EVERYONE feel like you're not important... right? I guess everyone would feel this way. It makes me happy to know on who I can really count :)
love you all
IT WORKED!
I've been trying to get a way to have a free photoshop CS3 for MONTHS and somehow, it NEVER worked!
not only are every serial keys online not available, you need to pay on a charged lineto get the authorization number once you entered the serial number.
BUT I tried EVERYTHING that was said to make it work other than installing the trial and pushing the dates behind for it to work again and again and again.
JM got me a CD froma coworker with the program and a crack on it. I managed to find the torrent he used to get it 4 months later! (AKA TONIGHT) and it explained that the file had to REPLACE the original photoshop.exe file.
AND the reason his CD wasn't working is that the setup file for photoshop itself was not sane. it was broken and so it couldn't be installed. I reinstalled CS3 extended I got from a torrent months ago and used the crack file from the CD... it WORKED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
forEVER!
I will now be able to work on the next Ronincards commissions :D
I also found a lot of pis of jm and I... -sigh of happyness- they're great!
now onto updates.
My mother activated the expander tonight, top and bottom. PEople told me that it would hurt like a moffo and that I would prefer to sleep to forget the pain. I was scared when I laid down on the table and mom put the key inside. I was expecting pain and huge discomfort.
Top: She did it firts. There was resistence when she turned and there is a pressure from the bottom of my nose that goes through my cheeks slightly.
Bottom: not much resistence, not discomfort of any sorts.
overall, there is a pressureon the top, but a VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY x 100000000 toleration possibility. AKA no big deal at all. Sure it feels like when your nose is stuck and you need to blow it. but I barely feel it anymore after 15 minutes.
I got used to speaking a bit more so only a few things like "ch" and "j" and "t"'s are hard to pronounce but it's getting tons better. My tongue doesn't get cut anymore on the box and bars AND my cheeks feel good even with the 4 brackets on the sides. I had troubles speaking the other day at work, AND it was hurting me everytime I was talking after a couple of hours.
Now, it's all okay ^^ I'm sure it'll be easier than I thought and what people thought. I still can't eat much food yet, but once my teeth have stopped being as sensitive as they are now, I should be able to eat more :) right now, I eat soft things like pasta, eggs, bread in small pieces, hard food in spall pieces, and no veggies. veggies that crunch are said to unglue the expanders easily as well as candies and bubblegum. I'll have to substitute those. fruits, they're canned fruits that are easy to swallow in small pieces :)
I also eat puddings and yougurts.
as another note, jm called me today and showed me THIS http://www.chalets.ca/en/chalets/89
the cottage looks awesome. There's a big bath, a sauna, a fireplace, a queen sized bed, and OMG it's REALLY the style of house I LOVE. He said he might bring me there at the end of march. wouldn't it be a great thing? I bet! we'll see how things goes :) it'd be awesome!
JM toldme the other day that something lacked. We weren't like before and we were falling into a routine... I tried as well as I could today to make him feel differently... I wanted him to lie down on my lap so we would feel warm cuddled together, thinking of nothing. Ittook hima while to forget he HAD to play WoW. But hemanagedto forget. When I left, you can guess it, he played Wow. No big deal since I was going to get those fucking expanders installed.
He gets home, and I've been waiting for him since he hasn't called at 10 pm on his break. I talk to him 5 minutes and ask him a question about ventrilo. he then says he HAS to go because he HAS to play Wow... he told me things in a hurry...
and you can guess it. I felt like shit and still feel like shit. I'm going to bed on a VERY depressed mind and wasn't expecting something like it. I was expecting him to tell me about his evening, how it went, I didn't have timeto ask my own questions about how his day was that he logged off to go play Wow again...
I sent him an e-mail expressing how I felt, just like right now. only I know he's rather hard headed justlike me and he'll probably think I'm stupid for thinking that and feeling bad...
If he hadn't told me about how he felt the other day... I wouldn't feel like this right now. I feel like shit because I worry. I love him so much, and he says he loves me too, but I feel like my today's efforts were so USELESS that it made things worst...
I better stop crying, my headache just keeps getting worst... I hope tomorrow will be going fine and I wont think about this too much during class... or at least I hope he's goingto e-ail me back something... I dearly wish for kind words... HIS not anyone else's...
I was feeling so well this week, this totally crushed me...
and another reason for him not to love me anymore... I speak andsound like a retard with those things in my mouth...
-wanders off crying in her pillow-
We're done with DEP1, meaning the most horrible part (theory) of our formation is finished! instead of ending class at 2'o clock, it' at 3'o clock.
AND we're in more practice classes than the first semester (dep1)
As for my braces and expanders, things are going smoothly. I still have problems eating solid food, but a lot less. My enamel is VERy sensitive with the rubberbands between the molars. But I eat quite well but not as much. I get tired of eating after a few bites and got used to not eat all that much. I remember not feeling hungry at all for a whole day because of the pushing feeling. Now, I eat just a bit enough. If I don't eat a normal meal, I take something that contains fat and sugar to make me hold the day long until I get home and eat supper at around 5:30 pm.
Only one week left before I get the expanders for 9 months. this means, no eating well for 9 months. It's gonna be hard at the beggining to chew things and to get used to have this wierd thing inside my mouth (THINGS plurial form, top and bottom).
headaches and discomfort all the way for 3 weeks until I get used to the constant pressure on my skull. But then, it's gonna be way better and I'll have to change my eating habits to fit the expanders, and afterwards my braces. I wouldn't do a thing in my whole life to break the lock box or the brackets. BELIEVE me, in my situation, you wouldn't dare go against your specialist's orders. I already recieved a 250 bucks of the 1k the insurances are giving me back. Easing the pain of the wallet :)
I also need to pay my driver's licence VERY soon! feb 8 is coming quite fast (my birthday).
To come back to orthodontist things again, I had to mention the fact that I can't feel the rubber bands anymore!!!!!!! it's a plus! I can stand a whole more week! then it's back to school too (on feb 1, friday, the day after I get my expanders in my mouth).
I lost a bit of weight without realizing, already. I put my pants on today and every step I did, I LOST them!!!! they kept slipping off (okay, not completetly, but you know, at the underwear line where people could see if I wasn't wearing long shirts.
So that's it I guess! now I'm off to bed (headache) and SLEEP!!!!!! I need much of it. I need to clean a vest and tube shirt before from today'S coloration. somehow some slipped INSIDE my protective clothes... weird eh?
Well, as of today I have been taking two advils this morning and none others which is a good sign my front teeth have started adjusting to the rubber bands. I have extremely sensitive teeth which prevents me from eating solid food. If it's solid, gotta eat it from little pieces, squash it in my palate or bite on it from my two front teeth, slowly. But so far, I've been eating quite normally even without eating red meat. I replace it with different things. I even ate a bit of cadburry small eggs today (yay!)
I'm going on tuesday at 1 pm to get my new x-rays and pictures taken for my orthodontic folder. This means I will have new before pictures and x-rays showing how my teeth are now that things have moved.
I really don't complain as much since this morning. What kills me the most are my ulcers. But I've been given oral-B stuff for rinsing for ulcers. My mom's friend had braces and used this before instead of water diluted salt. it's pretty quit and tastes a lot better :) hopefully the one beside my gum and tongue disapears soon. it's already way better than it was. only when food is stuck on my teeth, I can't use my tongue to take them out because it stretches my ulcer and hurts badly XP
but it's A LOT better than before because I can touch it with my tongue without making faces :P
Only 10 days before I get the expander stuck in. I can already feel my teeth not aligned as well already just becuase of the bands!
for an example, between one of my top and bottom tooth I could put a straw through it. Now, nothing fits. This means my teeth really have moved and tightened together in the front. As soon as the expanders to the job, after a week I should see a difference in my teeth alignment and should have a few spaces between. Some friends told me their expanders created a space big enough to fit a spoon! (imagine a gap that fits a spoon... worst than sponge bob's)
I'm starting to look positive in this because today, only a quarter of the usual advils I take were necessary! :) and I could work no problem without complaining "ow... front teeth started to pressure... need advils" NEVER did this thought go through my mind since 11:19 am when I took my two advils.
Now I'm about to shower and head to bed for a good customer's day tomorrow at the salon (school).
Friday was a customer's day and we welcomed many ladies to get haircuts. I was a receptionnist because I missed that kind of job. Still, I was left alone for more than 2 hours in my whole day while I was writting down the 89 messages we had in our inbox. it's to do again tomorrow AND we need to call back ALL those people. Some even called in november before the holidays!
lots of them wnt to get january appointment but we have this is our last week before the next semester starts and we have one whole week of school off from january 25 to feb 1st.
We also have a new hairdresser's groop starting on the first :) can't wait to see the new students!
And we're starting coloration (basic hairdye) on customer's this week. I asked my coworker, Julie if she wanted to come and seems to have said yes so far :) she'll need to com ein the dday thursday to get it done, and we'll be a pair on her hair just to make sure (teacher's will).
now I'm REALLY off to shower. dad's gonna get home and kill me if I'm still on my computer and not in bed!!!
January 14 2008.
I went at 3:50 pm to start the orthodontics and cavity fixing. I got two cavities fixed and they isntalled rubberbands at the back of my mouth, between my teeth (molars).
The back right teeth were SO TIGHT together they cut me with floss they were using to get them between the molars. the things they used even being sterilized created 3 ulcers inside my mouth: one on the inside of my gum on the right side, one on the bottom outside at the same place, and another at the right, top gum on the outside. THEN once they were done, I couldn't talk because of the pain it did to my jaw from pushing hard to get the rubber bands in.
I slept all evening and all night and stayed home the next day for my grand aunt's funeral.
it was VERY uncomfortable. It kind of hurts when it gets late and my body is exhausted. So the rubber bands are there to create a space between my teeth to put in the palatal expander in the future (january 31st). I need to get my palatal expended to get my teeth to fit in. For 9 months, I'll have these in, top and bottom which I'll be tightening every day to expend.
So the rubberbands prevent me from eating solid food. I can eat peaches in juice, apple sauce, small sandwiches and all. IO even ate a few fries and vol-au-vent! Only, it's a lot of effort to eat when teeth are sensitive and rubberbands prevent from bitting.
January 17 2008.
Today, they took out the rubberbands (OMG FELT SOOOOO GOOD!) And have added the metal pins around my molars to hold the expander to see if it was fine. It was even though it hurt like hell when he told me to bite and it was almost digging inside my gum (goddamn pain).
He took the circles out and took the prints for my folder and palatal fitting. (disgusting... I already did it once and had to REdo it). I was feeling wonderful without the rubber bands when he said "well, we'll put back the rubber bands!"
holy cow... not only did he put them back fine (almost not feeling them unless I eat) but he added FOUR (4) more!!!!!!! on the top!!!!!!!! THESE FUCKING HURT RIGHT NOW!!! they're so fucking tight they make me want to die T_T I' writting this because tiredness is making things worst. I need to go to sleep and take a shower before so...
I'll end it on that.
I should get x-rays redone january 22nd and the expander should be put in on january 31. (because he says he needs the x-rays before the expander is in) For 9 months. 9 months with the expander with eventual gaps between my teeth >_>
now I'm off, hurts bad, shower is needed and all
I'll write back in a few days when it feels better
have you guys seen on Maur these people who were afraid of... wierd things?
this girl was scared of pickles, a guy of peaches, a girl of birds and another of.... mustard.
somehow, I DON'T understand their fear for those things. like they probably don't understand My phobia.
People tell me "you're exagerating when you say "phobia""
well I'm clearly not. I have a friend who said she hypocondriac (is it that?) and she couldn'T hang out in a place crowded of people. Yet, she managed to go to rock shows no problem. THAT isn't hypocondriac... it's personnal space taking. Other's aura take place in hers and intertwines the wrong way considering their differences. But it doesn't mean you havea phobia of crowds. No one feels comfortable stuck between two armpits! (they don't belong to the same person either!)
But I've recently found out my fear of spiders was actually a phobia. I can fix a spider when it's close by, but the second it comes close, I run away... A spider in my room? I sleep somewhere else. A dead spider in the garbage, shivers and fear, staying away from it.
sometimes I stand spider (tarentulla are included) pictures... but rarely do I stand seeing them move. A video? I cry from the fear and feel extremely nauseous. I hate them spiders. icky, hairy, wierd looking, feels like they want to kill you all the time. I NEVER want to confront this fear... NEVER. Even if it's a cure, I DON'T want to be cured. I'd rather do anything to avoid them than to touch one or get close to one. I'd be the kind to run away and hide in a corner, or under my blankets. It climbs in my bed? I just keep on running away...
seriously, it's THAT bad.
that was my small post. arachnophobia
J-M, I love him very much. EVerything he does, I may not always be happy, but I always respect his choices because if I were in his shoes, I'd LOVE to have my ways accepted. It's small things such as buying things he doesn't need, but hey, everyone does that.
I know he changes his mind alot and once more, he changed his mind. I'm okay with it because things will be less thrown in his face. he'll have more time to save up money to move out and all. He decided to move out only when I finish school. So we can move out together. Good thing, right? well yes! He was sure to have an appartment but he seems to have changed his mind to wait and save up for a house instead. I never save up... ._. I,m ashamed... it's hard, with school, braces and all the crap. it's important and it's NOW or never because when I move out, there will be no room for such expences.
SO far, he actually did a move by saying we'd get engaged on march 8. Why? because he asked me this evening if I was still interested into going to this manor in Quebec for a night. Then, he mentionned he didn't mind the price since we'd get engaged only once. So he gave it away and said he could get his titanium ring he wanted. I'm happy he can get the one ring he wants as well as being kind enough to get mine... You're such a sweetheart. (I bothered him enough with it he's probably sick of it...)
unless something happens, gets in the way or changes his mind, it's pretty sure march 8 will be a remarkable evening and day for me :)
spending my whole vacation with him showed me we could get along pretty well together all the time. Not only in the weekend but everyday. I guess we made a good step foward just this christmas holidays.
JE T'AIME!!!
Seriously, I can't wait until school is done and we move out together. It'll be one HUGE step in our relationship :)
My birthday is coming up! one more month!
here's my schedule.
FEB 8 - my birthday, celebrating with friends that night
FEB 9 - Amanda's birthday, she said we'd go eat indian food with her and her parents
FEB 16 - Party at Jean-Mathieu's for our birthday, with our closest friends (playing ROCKBAND BABES!) (BUT didn't forget your birthday Jenn :) <3<3<3<3<3
FEB 22 - J-M's 23rd birthday!
MRCH 5 - our 5th anniversary
MRCH 8 - Night at Quebec's voctorian Manoir (in quebec city)
This is gonna be a hell of a month :) pretty cool if you ask me!
I'm also starting food cure tomorrow. I need to resist night urges to eat... when I'm bored, no eating. also for soda drinking cure... I need to drink WATER. I do that at work now. water instead of pepsi.
GOODLUCK!
and HAPPY NEW YEAR 08 EVERYONE!!!!!
can you believe it? I started going out with him I had just turned 15 years old... he had turned 18 just then... I'm turning 20 and he's turning 23. I met Al I was 13... addly we haven'T gotten in touch since last april. No news in any way... sad :( I guess things never turn out the way we want them to. I wish he could assist my wedding when jm and I get married in a few years, but seems like losing contact will make him impossible to be here.
if he ever reads, or ayone else, LOVE YOU AND TAKE CARE!
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